Aussie’s been real busy mining iron ore. Coal too. Boosting GDP to $1.4trln. Shipping it to hungry Chinese mills. And of course, those lucky blokes discovered natural gas. Gonna be exporting more than Qatar within 5yrs. But Australia only has 3.9bln barrels of proven oil reserves (0.2% of Earth’s total). So they import it. For now anyway. You see, they just discovered 233bln barrels. Embedded in rock. Worth trillions

Bernanke taped his wrists. Clapped his chalky hands. Grabbed the bar. Squatted. Grimaced. Grunted. And behold, the weight slowly rose. A record $3trln balance sheet (vs just $924bln when Lehman fulded). Ben’s adding $85bln/mth. Go Bro! And oh my, hedge funds bought 24% of the $3.3bln Portuguese 5yr auction (at 4.89% vs 23% in Jan ’12). Heave ho! But now it’s time for Merkel to score some PED’s. You see, Angie just lo

US companies will earn $1trln this yr according to 10k analysts (equal to US Federal Gov’t borrowing this yr – and each of the past 4). $1trln profit is 100% more than US companies earned in 2000, when 10 yr treasuries yielded 6% and the S&P 500 first peaked 2% above current levels. And it’s 30% more than companies earned in 2007, when 10yrs yielded 5% and stocks peaked 5% higher than here. And that math works, ’

“But how about Obama-care?” asked Mara, rolling our corporate health-insurance policy to a single-family plan. “That is Obama care,” replied the broker. You see, our insurance costs have been rising dramatically. And now they’re going up by another 50% starting next yr. Guaranteed. So she called USAA – they insure military families (Mara’s dad was a vet). “Sorry, California’s one of the few states where we’re n

“They’re just numbers you know, 15, 16, 20,” remarked one of the top 5 equity traders I’ve ever known. “You tell people the S&P is heading to 1,700 and they look at you funny,” he admitted, laughing. “How could it possibly happen with soft earnings, and the risk of another 2008,” he asked, not waiting for an answer. “It just could, stocks have been unloved for yrs, balance sheets are healthy, and ’08 won’t happen

“Everyone’s getting out,” explained the biggest trader in S&P’s. “It’s a hardware company, like Sony, which loses money every quarter, or Levi’s, remember them?” He thinks Apple could go to $300. Or $50. Who knows, who cares. “People buy things that go up, Apple’s done, so they’re moving on.” Then buying transports, financials, etc. “Apple was the leader, now it’s the Antichrist, it falls, traders get scared, sel

“If you owned stocks, you made a fortune, made your career,” continued the S&P trader. “The first part of any move is tough, painful.” Which pretty well captures the past few yrs. “Then it accelerates, get’s easier,” he said, describing today’s mkt. “The Russell and Transports just made all-time highs, mid-caps too, S&P 500 at 5yr highs, yet the Nasdaq is weak.” Tech led the mkt higher for yrs, but that’s cha

I need a f’in gun. High caliber. Short muzzle. One bullet. In my mouth. “Maybe if you hold him, comfort him, he’ll calm down,” she suggested, neatly tucking condescension into a sexy French accent. You see, my 3yr old was in full tantrum. He wasn’t alone. The room swarmed with spoiled, angry hornets, sweating in parka’s, waiting for ski school. Mara and our three oldest saw this coming and fled. Outside. Leaving me a

Hope all goes well. Been a while. Missed you. Missed this. Anyhow, what’s my status? Happily married, sexy wife, four kids, a dog, hamster, fish and frog. Skiing more. Climbing. Riding too. Professionally? I’m single. Dating around. Perfect dimes. Some racy nines. A few eights with lots of personality. And one frisky fiver that I swear to god looked like a nine after eight vodka tonics – never again. Of course

“An elitist hypocrite,” scowled the NRA in an ad. You see, Obama surrounds his kiddies with Secret Service agents, but rejects demands for Navy Seals on every playground. See? Hypocrite! But all presidents are. Elitist too. Hell, we all are. Scratch the surface, you’ll see. Take Mervyn King, the Evil Knievel of central banking risk takers. Merv warned that UK investors are “making worryingly risky bets at a time when